A friend suggested I start a blog to record my struggles with food and obsession with my body in an attempt to document how Christ uses this struggle to draw me closer to Himself and to set me free from this bondage to bingeing/restricting.
Over a decade of binge eating have brought me feelings of shame and unholiness. This led me to pursue restricting and at times I would try to eat as little as possible to avoid fainting and lose as much weight as quickly as possible.
If only I were thin, I would be happy. If only I wore a size 2, I would be happy. If I was thin, I would be more attractive and more worthy to be loved. If I were really too thin, people would admire my self-control and envy me, giving me the attention I desire.
These are all lies. Lies from the pit of Hell. Lies that Satan wants girls and women to believe to minimize our joy in Christ.
Being thin, being a size 2 will never fill the emptiness inside. I'm just now starting to trust and believe that God loves me and I am beautiful in his sight because He formed me, he knitted me together in my mother's womb, to be reflection of His glory! That is beautiful!
5 years ago
Emily, you are so dear to me! This is wonderful. Thank you for humbly sharing this so that others might benefit for the sake of the gospel. I am praising the Lord greatly right now for His strength of perseverance He has granted you in overcoming this. Thank you Emily for allowing this to be used for God's glory and for others good. Praise God. I look forward to reading your blog! :) I am praying for you my beautiful friend! I love you!
ReplyDeleteSweet Emily,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing this with me. I praise God for giving you the courage to share your struggle with the flesh, but what is more, your joy in Jesus Christ. I praise God for creating you and causing our paths to cross.
Rejoicing,
Jenn :)
Emily, I'm so encouraged. I'm encouraged to focus less on how to be pretty and attention-getting that way. I'm encouraged to focus less on myself, and more on loving others around me. I'm encouraged to find joy in Christ, not myself.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for this blog post, and thank you for being so honest for God's glory. I love you, beautiful friend!